A fun fact about me is that I’m a serial song listener. You know how you get upset with the radio (if you even still listen to the radio) for always playing the same songs on repeat until you are so annoyed you switch the channel so fast or hit the skip button on Spotify? Yep, that’s me. I binge listen to the songs I love at that time.
One song I’ve had on repeat lately says this:
“There are blessings all around you
Open up your eyes
Feel the sunlight fall upon you
Let it free your mind
There are blessings all around you
Take a step outside
Let your heart shine in a new light
See it come alive”
I share that because one of the things we get to do as a Raleigh Fellow is get plugged into the church community through serving in the youth group at Apostles. This isn’t a paid ad by Hayes for why everyone should lead at youth, but it is always so fun to see fellows of past and present along with other young adults going crazy while playing a game and then diving deep into the word with kids from 5th graders to seniors in high school. The Lord has used this time to speak to me through their questions about the gospel John. There are passages you hear over and over as a believer in church, but even in last night's convo, we talked about if God has unconditional love for us, then why does He say keep my commandments to remain in his love. Sounds pretty conditional? These are some questions even as adults we can overthink, and we can feel like I must prove myself as a believer. What does it mean to a 9th grade girl and a 23-year-old to hear that they are chosen and loved by God? These are the things He reveals to us just in little convos with each other. We went from there and discussed what He really means about remaining in His love and how following His commandments is one way we show that we love him. It’s not an obeying thing, but it’s us understanding Him and his heart for us more.
Being involved in a youth group also meant I got to say BOOYAH a lot this month and basically made the word popular again. We went to a weekend camp called BOOYAH BRR, and it was just like the name. Booyah and Brr. So fun and so cold. I have never been to camp in Virginia, and that was first something I was so shocked by. Being from Georgia, Virginia always felt so far away, but lately, I have crossed the state border 3 out of 4 weekends this month just for retreats. I knew this would be a fun weekend because I also got a chance to bond more with the girls in my small group for a weekend. We got to play volleyball, do these literally games from the TV Show Survivor, and run for our lives during archery tag. I learned when it comes to flight vs. fight, I was SO FLIGHT. I would be hiding behind the obstacles as Rachel gave us a pep-talk. Towards the last rounds, we felt confident knocking our arrows, but I was still sending the arrow and screaming/running quickly away. I took on the role of picking up the other arrows and handing them to people to fire. It’s honest work.
Archery tag left us laughing, but the best moment was probably when we put on the best performance of “Love Story” by Taylor Swift (obviously) that got the crowd out of the bleachers and dancing. There was a karaoke night, and our cabin decided we were going to go big…we had a surprise fake proposal planned during the bridge. Just as the song was building though, they started to fade out the song! Linsey (our videographer and choreographer) and all the boys started chanting to keep playing the song. How could there be a surprise proposal if we NEVER got to that part of the song? All of us on stage began singing without the music, and slowly the background music was added back in. The boys from our church hopped up for the surprise proposal, and a spotlight was turned on. We sang, “He knelt to the ground, pulled out a ring, and said…” At that moment, everyone came running from the bleachers to join the dance party on the gymnasium floor.
What started as a little moment turned into a big dance party. The same could be said about what Jesus stirs in our hearts. There’s lately been a similar phrase in Christian communities of “planting seeds” to describe this idea of growth. Jesus was stirring up this joy, but also, he was stirring up these conversations that weekend that would lead to a deeper understanding. We talked a lot about how Jesus pursued us just like Hosea pursued Gomer. A lot going on in one weekend- BOOYAH! As I walked to the early leader meeting I was reminded of the song from earlier. There are just a lot of blessings all around us- from the crisp morning to the sun shining overhead, to the lack of cell service so I could focus on the moment (lol), and for Ian and Linsey also being there to share in the laughs and the bringing back BOOYAH as a popular phrase. There were also BRR moments like walking back to the cabin post shower at night. This camp had outhouses- BRR, but even those moments, we can count blessings. Our teeth might chatter, but we could see the stars above, and thankfully, go back to a warm cabin for late night talks.
Jesus is stringing these little moments along during my fellows year; like the retreats we had this month were full of discovering more of who He made us to be. Some of the things I’ve learned is I need to be an engineer in a non-engineering setting. I like to be a key player on a team, and I’m motivated by it. I scored 50/50 on the introvert/extrovert test which of course made me say, “Great. I’m divergent.” However, our teacher helped me see that I can thrive in a group setting while also being able to do work on my own and finish the job. I need a balance of which is something I hadn’t realized. I always just assumed I was an extrovert. This was helpful to understand when asking in a job interview what it would be like every day. Am I on a team? Am I just reporting to someone? Can I create spaces to experience both without getting burnt out? We had another retreat that gave us a good framework for living well. A lot of this year has been advice like this, but it’s because it all matters. Sounds simple, but even as I listen to Matthew McConaughey’s memoir, he says the same thing. This message is constantly being shared all over. We learned about making generous assumptions, understanding we have influence in our life over how we react, and that finishing the job matters.
The only weekend this month that I didn’t venture to Virginia was when I got to go to Carolina Point, a YoungLife camp. Yes, this month my go-bag stayed packed. Clemson WyldLife was going there for weekend camp, and I was asked to sing. I got the opportunity to see old familiar faces from the school I led at, some girls that were my first friends at the school were now serving on the work crew, and I saw my sweet teammates from last year. Again, the idea of blessings all around us. This month was all go-go-go, but I still got a chance to step outside and see all that He has done and is doing currently in my life through this community.
