You stand in line. You rock gently back and forth to the beat of your own music. A person walks up to you and tells you to stop moving. You stare in confusion as they walk away. Why are they allowed to move and you aren’t?
You stand in line. Sunglasses protecting your eyes from the harsh florescent lights blaring above. A new person comes up to you, and demands you remove the sunglasses. They then walk outside, placing the sunglasses over their eyes. “It’s because it’s bright out.” they explain. You explain that it’s bright inside as well. They cannot hear you, you are in a bubble. No one can hear you.
You stand in line. A third person walks up to you, yelling at you to get out of line. You begin to move away, frustrated by their own arrogance and anger, but they suddenly change their demeanor. “It was just a joke, don’t be so literal!” they laugh. You stare, unsure why they think yelling and downtrodding is funny. You stand in line. Seconds, minutes, hours, pass by. You check your watch - it’s been 2 minutes. Another few hours pass by - it’s been 4 minutes.
You stand in line. You want to sit down, but are yelled at for resting. “No one else is tired, you’re not tired either!” you are told. You tell them you are indeed tired. They cannot hear you, you are in a bubble.
You stand in line. You suddenly become aware that you have no idea why you’re in line or what it’s for. You’ve been there so long you’ve forgotten why. Or did you never know to begin with?
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I wrote this in a moment of doubt. Its nothing but an expression of a deep-seated feeling found in the dark confines of your gut. Questions of “Is this worth it?” “Am I doing whats right?” “When will this period end?” “Is He faithful to show me the fruit of my efforts” “Is it selfish to want Him to show me fruit?” “What are my intentions?” etc etc etc ——All thoughts and feelings produced by an unbound faith in Him.
Today I am thankful that He is faithful, and that he shows this faithfulness when I need to see it. Not only that, but he displays his faithfulness in explicit concrete ways where his wayward son (me) can see and be reminded of it.
“He will Surely Do IT!”- 1 Thessalonians 5:24
Best,
Landon